Not one bit

When I'm driving down the mountain and music fills the spaces all around me
with songs like this:

 

 or this:

 

That's when the right words suddenly pour from some hidden spring buried deep within my brain. Music is the magic tap, always....

Twice in two weeks, it has come up, this wonderful life of mine. A "soccer mom" comment and a "what DO you do all day?"

Maybe it's because I look weightless, burdens safely tucked in the palm of my hand and not strapped to my back. Or maybe it's because I find joy in my living. Or maybe it's because I live like I mean it. Or maybe because I live every day with gratitude. Money does not make me happy, and managing it is my least favorite thing to do. But living like everyday is my last, that's what makes a life a good life. So hell yes, I will paint, I will write, I will take pictures, I will snowboard, hike, learn to do new things and I will do it all while being the best mom and wife that I can be, because that is what I am here to do.

To live, to love and to learn, shamelessly, earnestly, completely.

But I don't say these things out loud, even though I want to. Even though I want to let them know that we made distinct choices before our children were born, that we have paid our dues to have the life we have, to say that my life as a stay-at-home mom is the hardest thing that I have ever done, or explain away all the hours of hard work that my husband continues to do to allow me to be that stay-at-home mom, and that the relationship that we have with our children has been worth every single choice that we've ever made. No, I don't owe them guilt, shame, excuse, or explanation, not anything.

Not. one. bit. :)

xoxox

Messages

Yesterday, I was driving down Pearl St. here in Boulder, as I often do, when something new came into vision and caused me to brake impulsively. Knowing I had my cameras, all I wanted to do was capture and absorb what I had seen.

Monarch Dragon (shot with sx-70, i.p. color shade cool)

Sometimes little stories, anecdotes, dreams, or messages arise from things that captivate me, just as it should. I find myself daydreaming often, propelled by the lessons that currently seek to merge with my conscious mind. Most of these messages are deeply personal, but today I am struck by an awareness that these messages may not be just for me, that they are for anyone struggling to find their most powerful creative voice.

I am not alive if I cannot lose myself in the mesmerizing space between this earthly place and the ethereal home of my soul.

I wander aimlessly at times, too aimlessly for my own good. But it is here in these imaginations that I find inspiration and a call to be something more than the serious and humanly woman that I am.

I am the shadow, the tiny crumb of earth covered in flesh, wanting nothing more but to fly amidst the dragons in their full, fiery splendor. I am called, yet I am rooted, and seek desperately for a blade to slice the strings that hold me firmly planted to this place.

A voice echoes from within, "Stop wandering dear girl, and build tirelessly the wings that will fly you to the realm you seek. Keep your head to the sky and sink not into the comforts of escape that will most assuredly want to envelope you. Turn these burning desires into the fuel that you feed upon, let them guide and lift you intuitively, until naturally, you become the thing you are meant to be."

Too long have I lived in the shadowy darkness of longing, of wishing, of wondering. Too long have I been frozen and too afraid to unleash the deep, inner workings of my creative soul. No one should be so starved. Not me, not you, not anyone.  Leave the shadow behind and don the wings that were meant for you and only you. Bring to life your purpose, your gifts, your passion, and hide in the darkness no more.

AndroidJones.com

Thank you for letting me share this message with you,
fearlessly....

xoxo

ps. I recently submitted and was accepted into words to shoot by's most recent collaboration~ water. I am utterly honored and hope you stop by to visit everyone's submissions :).