"We are all wanderers on this earth...our hearts are full of wonder, and our souls are deep with dreams." ~ Gypsy proverb

Friday, June 29, 2012

A grumbling, then a hum

Do you feel a grumbling sometimes? Like a slight tingle vibrating under the skin, hungry for something that can't be explained? A wanting, a needing, a breath that just can't be filled? This grumbling has passed through here recently and the door of discontent has been opened. It's hard not to, so I look inside.

Happiness and dissatisfaction can reside in the same space. I know this.
So I allow this dis-ease that I am not living to my full potential loom. Stay with it, I tell myself, stay with the discomfort for as long as it needs to last, stay present. Invisible vines remain wrapped around my ankles, but my dreams keep me afloat. This feeling is all too familiar, but for now they are thoughts that pass by above like the white against the blue. For now, it still is just a grumbling, a rumbling, and a crescendo that hasn't hit its peak. My time to clip those vines isn't here yet, and I know it.

So I grasp the handle, and slowly, close the door.

I shake my head to remove the hair from my eyes, feeling as if I just passed through a portal. My vision clears and I see Alfie's leg has takes over my keyboard. Joy, that's what this cat brings. I focus on what comes next:

A Heidi Swanson dinner that I am cooking for the first time tonight (wish me luck!) for a lovely new friend named Canary

A night with Hubs at the Avett Brothers' concert in Red Rocks!!

Another hike planned for tomorrow morning with the boy.

And I find myself humming this song... :)...

some nights by fun. on Grooveshark

Much love to you all...

xoxo

Keeping it Real...


11 comments:

  1. I hear you. staying with the discomfort, that's what I'm trying to do too.

    good luck with the dinner :)

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  2. i felt this sometimes while raising my five. the time will come when you will be climbing that vine. the avett brothers are my very favorite band. they played once at a small venue here. have a wonderful time! wish i were there!

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  3. staying with the discomfort takes courage. i know you have tons of that. and patience too huh? to wait for the right clipping time.

    plenty of good things to keep you busy, including a funny leg. :D

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  4. you are awesome! staying with that grumble. it is one of the most important things and hardest things to do in this Place. step by step and surrounded by love and good music <3

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  5. I can see you're reading Pema! Staying and sitting with discomfort is so hard sometimes - my first instinct is to try and find a distraction. Cute kitties are good for that.

    xo
    cortnie

    p.s. Thank you so much for my postcard from Paris! We have it up on the fridge so the boys can look at the Eiffel Tower. :)

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  6. It ebbs and flows, like you said in a previous comment on my blog. It's going in and sitting with it, looking at it- like you said. I know you also appreciate so much about your life and that makes all the difference.

    XO
    C

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    1. p.s. looks like kitty is relaxing in just fine!

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  7. Oh, I know that feeling all to well. There are days when I feel light and radiant and know that I am on my path. But, too often there are the days of discomfort. It is just sitting with, knowing that there will times of satisfaction. Life is right now. :) xo

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  8. You are so lovely and wise. I am experiencing the same now. Thanks for the reminder that satisfaction is there too and for the reminder to sit and be with it.
    much love sweets!
    xo

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  9. Love the Avett Bros AND catching a show with my hubs! makes it seem just a bit better doesn't it:)

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“Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.”
~ George Bernard Shaw