"We are all wanderers on this earth...our hearts are full of wonder, and our souls are deep with dreams." ~ Gypsy proverb

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

All too brief

All too brief are the moments that hold me still. I sweep by the cat knowing he begs for my attention. I turn and see him gazing at me with those large green eyes. Soul gazers... that is what they are.

As I sat and watched you in your piano lesson, I didn't see a 10 year old. I saw a 2 year old, with the same eager smile, the same playful energy, the same long lashes that would soak with tears if I left your sight. My own eyes begin to well and my vision blurs--"No!" I thought, not here, not in front of your piano teacher, you would be so embarrassed! But you must know, I won't tell you now, but one day you must know, that my heart bursts with love and pride for the boy you have become, for the man I know you will be...
I look away until I'm sure my eyes are dry, pull out the checkbook, and write.

So much to hold, so much to embrace, all of it, far too brief.


ps. Thank you all for your comments of support and experience on my last post. I am grateful for every single one...

If I Were

There are lots of ways to dance and
to spin, sometimes it just starts my
feet first then my entire body, I am
spinning no one can see it but it is
happening. I am so glad to be alive,
I am so glad to be loving and loved.
Even if I were close to the finish,
even if I were at my final breath, I
would be here to take a stand, bereft
of such astonishments, but for them.

If I were a Sufi for sure I would be
one of the spinning kind.

From A Thousand Mornings, Mary Oliver


  1. Glad to know I am not the only mama that has these tearful moments. It is amazing to watch our children grow and evolve!!!!
    Great Post MJ
    Chey xo

  2. Sometimes it's so hard being a mama! Hugs to you my dear friend.

  3. precious boy. I tear a lot. My kids are used to it, it means I am so full of love I leak out :)

  4. All to brief is how I have been feeling these last few days, trying to embrace and be present in each and every moment.

  5. So enjoyed this post and empathize with your last. I was speaking on the phone with a close friend today who is over- whelmed with her 3 and 1 year old sons. I told her exactly that: It is brief (but beautiful), and there is no completely right way or foolproof parenting method. I personally take great comfort that the God who created them {quirks, personalities, and all} knows the best path for the best them and when I listen and wait that path will manifest its self to me because He loves the child and mother. Which if you think about it is not unlike Sherlock Holmes following clues (smile).

  6. i've had a day like that today. nothing special as far as situation. just the simplest moments, of her smiling, talking, doing. and me unable to kiss her enough. mama tears just behind my lashes.

  7. oh mama, those are good tears and sometimes, they're just what is needed :)

  8. <3 I may not be a mother yet but your words make me feel a little bit of emotional right now. You are such a loving mother. And your son is lucky to have you.


“Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.”
~ George Bernard Shaw