"We are all wanderers on this earth...our hearts are full of wonder, and our souls are deep with dreams." ~ Gypsy proverb

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

A passing bird

This befuddled mess, this mess I want to blame on pms, has me compressed in the imaginary walls within my mind.

I remember this place. A place where I am at the mercy of unfiltered sensations, like bullets that graze the skin no matter where I hide. This is the fear that kept me small, kept me hidden, kept me under layers and layers of thoughts that spent hours chasing it's own tail. I remember once, Crazy had me pinned to something I was not.

But that was a long time ago.
And now I know,
the blues can visit,
but Crazy doesn't live here anymore.

I like to peel dried glue off my thumbs, dried skin from sunburns, and nail polish from my nails. I watch the flakes fall and stick to my cheap red coat. I brush them off as they were never a part of me, as if they never clung to me for dear life. It's the clinging that causes suffering. It's the piling that gradually suffocates. It's the hanging on for dear life that keeps us distracted from the freedom that comes from letting it all go, from peeling the skin that we think we need so badly.

I don't shun the dark anymore.
Instead, I run with the wild in the blackest of nights...

The Dreamer by The Tallest Man on Earth on Grooveshark



  1. I don't shun the dark anymore.
    Instead, I run with the wild in the blackest of nights...


    Wishing you peace and love, MJ. x, Katie

  2. I'd like to see you take this line, "I run with the wild in the blackest of nights..." and write something around it *hint hint*

  3. i hear you, my shadow-running sister...i hear you..xoxo

  4. There's a lot of freedom in letting go........beautiful!

  5. that's the secret - running with the wild, rather than simply letting it engulf us.
    fab photo.

  6. Yes. Yes!
    I am right here with you.

  7. oh, I love this. thank you. thank you. thank you.

  8. this is nice to read this morning.
    it's so easy to forget that, on some level, all of us have been there, are there or will be there. it's the human condition, I think they call it.
    they are thoughts.
    and we give them power.
    or not.

  9. I feel like I could have written these same words (though not so beautifully). I get those visits too, and it is so nice to watch them eventually pass.

    take care of you, friend.



  10. beautiful you!
    you'll find me running in the dark halls beside you

    love and light

  11. Yes! Running wild. I almost chose "wild" as my word for the year. Your words beat down into my core. I too had my crazy days. There are times when she revisits briefly and I stare at her and wonder why she ever was. Oh, but oh, how we grow and stretch into wildness and sacredness. Feeling you. xoxo

  12. I remember chasing thoughts, following them to the dark places. Yeah, crazy doesn't live here anymore. Brave MJ. xoxo

  13. Crazy doesn't live here anymore.

    Wow MJ, beautiful and poignant.

  14. March is always my "witching" month too. Every year I forget and it hits me...and then I remember...then I say "oh crap" and put off laundry and vacuuming again. But like you "crazy doesn't live here anymore" saying that feels good doesn't it?


“Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.”
~ George Bernard Shaw