"We are all wanderers on this earth...our hearts are full of wonder, and our souls are deep with dreams." ~ Gypsy proverb

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Oh deer!! And the "why"

Okay okay, this Florida girl is enamored. Other than when we stayed in Virginia for a time, having deer in the backyard is certainly a new event for us. But I must ask the seasoned deer watchers, is it normal for deer to lounge in the backyard, among houses and neighboring children on their swingsets, all... day... long?  I found it so strange!!

We were actually able to go outside and just stand within 30 feet of them. They seemed perfectly comfortable--not necessarily tame, just comfortable. This can't be a good thing can it? They did finally leave around dusk, and now I find myself looking out every morning for our wandering neighbors to visit again :).

The Why
Lately, no--actually since we put the house on the market over a year ago, and now since we've arrived in Boulder, the "why" of moving has become a regular question, from friends, family, and new people we have met here. Why did we leave Florida, why did we choose Colorado (originally Virginia), why this big transition and risk, especially when our entire family and all that my children have known is still in FL? I did find two posts about this dated in November 2010 and January 2011, shortly after I started the blog, when my readership was 2.

"The grass is greener where you water it..."

"If we don't change we don't grow, if we don't grow, we are not really living~ Gail Sheehy"

Something happens when two people with the same dreams get together. I will never forget that date in the tiny sushi restaurant.  F. and I sat face to face interrogating each other on our hopes and ideas for the future. We both were moved by nature---specifically mountains, forests, hiking, and an outdoor lifestyle. We both had experiences growing up that anchored our spirituality in these places. Our feelings were indescribable, yet completely identifiable...we were on common ground. Coming from different parts of the world, and having moved frequently as children, we both knew that Florida was not the end place for us.


After that the rest seemed to flow naturally--love, marriage, children, then a nice big house with a pool. We had everything we wanted, except that one big dream that we shared together in that sushi restaurant. We almost let it go. We reasoned that we had a wonderful life, why change anything? Yes, maybe we felt that something was missing, that somewhere we weren't completely satisfied. But wasn't what we had enough to pacify us, to say, it's okay, life IS good just the way it is?

When the economy tanked, that was when the idea that we would really stay in Florida hit me. It was a tough blow. I realized that I had hung onto that dream, even if only by a thread, knowing that I really felt that I--that WE--belonged elsewhere. That was four years ago. I wish I could say that there was some spectacular event that made us kick caution and comfort to the curb, when we purposefully stepped off the beaten path and onto the one less traveled. Reflecting on it now, I will say this:

Unschooling, peaceful parenting, and transforming our thinking from one of robotic existence to one of following our joy changed our lives completely.


We had a major shift within our understanding, that the only thing that stands in the way of positive change is our own belief, that for whatever reason, we just can't do it. The economy, a mortgage, a job, family, money, there will always be really good reasons not to follow our dreams. We finally came to understand that our reasons to actually follow our hearts, were better. Even if we fail, even if/when we make mistakes, lose, cry, falter, at least we know we tried. We gave it a shot. We had to try, following our joy left us with no other option. Isn't this what it's all about?

I fear I have rambled on a bit, but now you know. We are in a place that we have always dreamed about, a place that we can walk out the front door and mountains (though they call them hills here :) are there to greet us every morning. Here is a place that we can commune with nature, and be fulfilled spiritually. We are in a place where our children can understand the importance of their environment, their planet, their beginnings, and perhaps begin to grasp what spirituality really is.

I am so happy to be able to share this with you, maybe even inspire you in some way, to remember some lost dream that perhaps still hangs by a thread. Anything is possible. Anything.

xoxo

ps. I meant to join in Cory's Thrifty Thursday today, but obviously got sidetracked. Please go and visit her link up for thrifting prowess-ness!

28 comments:

  1. I can relate. We jumped into a major change this last year, and I can only describe it as following our joy, as well. My whole family is feeling more truly content and alive, though life is not easier, in the common sense of the word. Congratulations on making the leap. I love that life is full of possibilities, if we let it be.

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  2. your dream is beautiful mj. i am so happy for you.

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  3. Beautiful, MJ. Thank you for the inspiration! xo

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  4. awwww. I remember when you just had two readers. I was one of them way back then.
    Love you as much as I can w/out having met you. You have blossomed so beautifully with this shift. You inspire! We love you for it!

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  5. here's to following your path, living your dream, making the change.

    i was in awe of colorado when i was there, so majestic and so unspoiled.

    the deer? very odd. we have deer here. they come into the back part of our lot in the evenings but they've never joined right in. yes, i think you are right as lovely as they are that would be a bit disconcerting.

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  6. I am so glad that you followed your dream and didn't just settle, life is too short for that! I am so enjoying the photos of your 'hills'!
    I love seeing all your deer, we have them on our property too, but I really wish they would leave my garden alone!

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  7. Tears, my friend. Inspirational, and exactly what I needed to read. I've have a personal dream for a couple of years, but, out of fear, I find reasons/excuses not to go after it. Reading this is an affirmation to what I believe in my heart - that even if I fail, at least I have tried. There are no regrets in trying. :) So very happy for you for following your dreams!!

    As for the deer, sometimes if they're around people enough, they get used to us. When my in-laws lived in a woodland community in Pennsylvania, they had deer that would eat out of our hands. I prefer them in their wild, untamed state, though.

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  8. beautiful post friend. i agree wholeheartedly. and i laughed a bit as you mentioned virginia...that's where we're leaning ;-) maybe one day our paths will cross.

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  9. Wonderful - all 3 posts + deer! You must be in north Boulder...we never had a single visitor way down south in the Table Mesa 'hood, but always saw them when we ventured north. I wish I had words to explain how watching your dreams come to fruition in a place where mine were shattered... But, I am so very, very happy for you and hope you can find just the right home. I loved Eldorado Springs...it's a ways south, but the raging water running through the place hooked me right away!

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    1. I'm with Rain, you must be in North Boulder... I think you're in our neighborhood, because I've seen those two very deer lounging exactly there on our afternoon walks almost daily. :)

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    2. Now that would be awesome if we were!!!!

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    3. when i lived on the west side of south boulder we had deer all the time too. totally natural that they hang all day. but soon they will also want to eat your flowers and anything else. and many many cheers on following your dream! what an exciting time.

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  10. Oh, I also loved Nederland. Again, a bit out of town, but you really feel like you're in the mountains there :-)

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  11. and thanks for the inspiration... it's time to dust off those old journals filled with dreams!

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  12. MJ, I felt touched by a lot of what you said - about what happens when two people with similar dreams get together, and all that can happen after that. And also about finding a place where you can grow spiritually - that has been a dream, a real longing, for me and my husband for a long time. We live in an ultra-conservative city and it's been a challenge finding a place where we can get our spiritual needs met. And those of our children. I'm so happy and encouraged by your story!

    xo
    cortnie

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  13. dear mj, you are fantastic. even the deer know. welcome to your new life. xxx lori

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  14. It is amazing what can happen when two people share the same dreams! (that's just how I feel about Joe) I'm so happy that you guys made the leap. Even when things don't look good on paper, if you know in your soul that it feels "right"...then I think you can never go wrong.

    I don't know about those deer, they're making me nervous. All our deer here run AWAY from people and cars. Maybe the east coast rat race energy makes them more nervous than the peaceful Boulder mountains :)

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  15. it's great to be a dreamer. you are awesome!

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  16. Oh MJ, I love this post and, yes, you do inspire with this big move! The "why" is oh so important, and many of us often let go of it for the reasons you describe.

    Thank you for your honesty and your bravery!

    Sending love!

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  17. wonderful. i felt part of your dreams just reading this. you know we are dream chasers to, so i get it totally.

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  18. So happy you bolded that paragraph, MJ because it's beautiful and poignant. The fact you kept talking about your dreams, well that's something many couples stop doing after children, financial strain..other things. Or they discuss it less and resign themselves to getting stuck in Florida. Stop trying, as you say. Or they no longer see the value in change, in being challenged and that can leave you so jaded. This post is definitely an inspiration

    Hugs to you Mountain Mumma xo

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  19. Good luck on your ventures. My gram always said that things happen for a reason. I truly believe it is so. May you stumble upon your whys along the way!!

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  20. I am so happy for you guys! You give me hope.

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  21. Oh such a wonderful and uplifting post MJ! So nice to remind ourselves to not let go of our dreams even if they don't happen right away. I'm glad you have found Colorado together, I'm sure you will be happy.

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  22. I hope you don't mind, but I'm printing this off, and keeping it in my journal. So much goodness locked away here for me to ponder and evaluate within my own life. I want to live following joy, not a robotic existence. Thank you for sharing this journey with us. :)

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  23. I know what you mean MJ about sharing that same passion and dream with your husband. And what a (sadly) rare blessing that is. But two people untied together with a same passion, with the same seeing eye creates the best of families...secure, snug, and fun. Tim and I are so often the odd man, make that family, out. And you can't always explain the why..you just know its right. I think some of the saddest things I have ever heard is someone not doing something that they really wanted to do...solely because "what others would think".
    Bless you on your journey.
    Cheers,
    Leah

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  24. Catching up on your life, MJ, and I really connect with this post. I especially love what you said about making mistakes, because we all make mistakes, and if we can use them as learning experiences, then that will help us to grow (not that I do that most of the time!)

    The deer question - we have deer that regularly pass through our yard, but they don't stay around for very long! That's amazing that your deer lounge around like the own the place ;)

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“Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.”
~ George Bernard Shaw